You do what you know.

My name is not Clarence, it's Charles (though Clarence and I have become close friends), and I'm a writer.

c0

I started my retail career at store level. I suppose you could say it started with Loblaws at the age of 16 when they had a sizeable presence in the northeast US. But I've spent nearly 25 years with a different retailer. Five of those were at the store. I needed a job and they had a sign in the window.

You do what you know.

c0

I've been writing since I was a kid and always dreamed of getting a novel published. I've written enough to fill a shelf and read enough to fill a private library. But although I'm an inveterate writer, I'm not very good at self-promotion (ask my boss). That's okay. Others are good at that, and that's the way it ought to be.

Recently while reading, a number of ideas that have run parallel for years intersected, and there where they met was a story.

And so, with no daily deadlines to publish, and a bit earlier than I had thought, I will spend my time on my next novel.

You do what you know.

c0

I'll make updates here, but very infrequently, and will post them to Facebook for those that follow me there.

Anyone wishing to contact me can reach me here.

The easiest way to get news is to subscribe. Just use the field on the left under "FOLLOW CLARENCE BY EMAIL." You'll only get an email when I publish a post. I have no clue who or how many do this, since the email is self-contained and you don't need to visit this blog or Facebook.

[2015-01-18]

c0

Sabbatical

I'll be taking an extended break from this blog. Visit tomorrow for more info.

Friend and coworker Ethan W sketched me recently during a meeting. It's a very gook likeness, I think.

[2015-01-18]

c0

Something like a guarded warmth (Would it matter in the end?)

I'm constantly amazed at how similar both sides of the Reformation sound when talking about the other.

It's not a mirror image, of course, and it's not the particulars that intrigue me, but the tone, and something like a guarded warmth. Some things can appear to be very different but be much alike (a Kindle Reader and a paperback book), or the reverse (the atom and the solar system).

I think Protestants and Catholics, despite stark visual and ceremonial differences, are indistinguishable on the essential Christian doctrines (eg, the Apostle's Creed).

Read this post, and see if you don't agree. Ignore the details. Consider the logic. It's a response to this question: "Why would it matter if you lived your life as a Protestant or a Catholic as far as your eternal destiny?... Why the fuss?"

Jan 12, '15, 11:01 am OraLabora Regular Member

Thread: Would it matter in the END?? Join Date: February 28, 2007 Posts: 5,871 Religion: Roman Catholic, Benedictine Oblate

Both Catholics and Protestants receive the gift of Grace through baptism. What one does with that Grace is another matter. Some Protestants take that Grace and run with it and truly go through inner conversion to Christ and through God's mercy are probably saved. Some Catholics receive that Grace and reject it or ignore it and set themselves well down the road to eternal damnation. By virtue of the Church holding the entire deposit of Truth, it should theoretically be easier for a Catholic to sustain his or her inner conversion, but the sad reality of our fallen nature often means we don't. Yet some Protestants even with the adversity of being in a ecclesial community that only possesses a part of the Truth, manage against all odds to conform their lives to Christ. They are saved through the Church though, because those bits of the Truth that their ecclesial communities possess came from the Church that Christ founded. So it isn't entirely an issue of being Catholic or being Protestant. It's a matter of finding God's plan for you and sticking with it, sustained by Grace. Being Catholic isn't automatic salvation, and being Protestant isn't automatic damnation. Think of it like this. Two people are driving alone through the desert and the fan belt breaks on each one's jeep. The Catholic is prepared and possesses a full tool kit that includes a spare fan belt. He repairs his jeep and can drive off at normal speed, confident he can make it safely to his destination. The Protestant has a few tools, but no spare fan belt. He manages to rig up a temporary solution with a piece of rope he found. He can still make it out of the desert IF he's careful, doesn't drive too fast, stops often to check the repair and tighten the rope... and prays a lot. The Catholic's tool kit includes the sanctifying grace distributed through worthy partaking of all 7 of the sacraments. The Protestant's tool kit includes maybe one or two sacraments, but is missing the rest. (S)he faces a much tougher task. Now take a Catholic and a Protestant again in the same situation, but the Catholic left his toolbox at home (i.e. he's ignored or rejected the gift of Grace). The Protestant, with his incomplete tool kit may, if extremely careful, be able to make it. The Catholic will die of thirst. Ultimately all will depend on God's mercy. The doomed Catholic may get a second chance (someone else drives by to rescue him or in real life will have a really good health scare), and hopefully will learn to not leave the tools at home next time. The Protestant's rope may break and fall off further down the road if he doesn't stop to check and tighten it frequently, and end up in the same predicament as the Catholic who left his tools at home, and may or may not get a second chance. Because we may not get a second chance with the gift we've been given, it behooves us, Catholic or Protestant, to do the best with what we've been given. __________________ U.I.O.G.D. Source >

[2015-01-15]

c0

What if the shoe were on the other foot?

"Larry Flynt Wheelchair" by Toglenn - Own work. Licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0 via Wikimedia Commons

Let's say a US magazine named, oh, Charles Weekly, regularly depicted Jesus as a terrorist, or gay. And let's say a number of the staff was killed by unhappy Christian fundamentalists.

Would fundamentalist Christians speak out?

Without a doubt.

Would they parade in large numbers with "I am Charles" on their shirts?

No, I don't think so

I'm convinced most Americans like talking about freedom of expression but don't really like it very much when they see it up close.

Why did Jerry Falwell sue Larry Flynt over Hustler's incestious parody of him?

How many Christians publically shared a kind word for Flynt when he was shot on his way back into court for an obscenity trial in 1978?

The tragic Charlie Hebdo events were made possible by the same irreverence and disgust.

c0

Hustler Magazine, Inc. v. Falwell >

Atlanta Magazine "Flashback: Larry Flynt shot in Lawrenceville" >

[2015-01-15]

I have a novel idea.

That is, an idea for a novel that's both original and familiar enough to find an audience.

Now that one child is in school and the other sleeping through the night, I have a couple hours at my keyboard, which is when I tie up loose ends at work, read, and blog.

When Mimi goes off to school, and before boys and teen angst get in the way, I just may have enough free evening time to develop my idea (which really will build on 100 pages or so I set aside a few years ago).

As some of you know, I did finish a book, a literary action/adventure (think Michael-Crichton-meets-William-Golding), but had no luck shopping it around.

This effort will be a roller coaster read, with just the right slope and height to make each plunge worth the wait.

If/when that day comes, I will likely suspend this blog and focus on that project, perhaps giving occasional updates.

c0

I'd love to tell you about it, but I won't. Not because the idea is too good it might get stolen, but because I hate to overpromise and underdeliver. But should I make it to, oh, 40,000 words, you'll hear about it here, because that will mean it's already finished in my head and I'm just letting the other 40,000 drip from my fingers.

[2015-01-14]

c0

Translating my morning.

Xiaohong: 迪迪，你站起来，现在，准备去上学！

Dee Dee: 五分钟时间？

X: 好.

(5 minutes pass)

X: 迪迪，你站起来，现在，准备去上学！

D: 妈妈，走开，让我睡觉！

X: 现在！

D: 我讨厌上学！！！

Baby Mimi wakes up: 哭

X: Xiao Charky, what are you doing standing there, can't you see I can use some help?

Me:

[2015-01-14]

c0

What doesn't kill me makes me stranger.

Heath Ledger as The Joker.

That may come as no surprise, or perhaps elicit a smile that I've finally realized what you've suspected all along.

I've always admired eccentrics - Einstein, for example, and Alexander Pope (18th C. Wit with Tourette's), and TV's rumpled sleuth, Lt. Columbo.

I'm among those who identify with slovenly genius and once romanticized about a world in which I am benignly and endearingly nonconformist.

But last week I went to work with two different shoes on. Now, I wasn't so feeble as to choose two left or two right shoes (I do have SOME marbles), but I did put on one left and one right from two different pair - both brown, same shade, but different pair nonetheless.

Top to bottom: 
 Peter Falk, 
 Einstein, 
Alexander Pope.

And I have a daily struggle getting my shirt buttons to match up. I get all the up to my neck and realize I am one button off and must start over.

And of course the other day, as you know, I tried to walk through a glass wall.

If I'm warm and comfortable, I don't care too much what I wear. And so long as I get enough to eat, what I eat doesn't matter. If my lawn is green, I don't mind if it's mostly weeds. Same with the roof over my head, the car I drive, etc.

I tell myself that I've programmed my brain to ignore trivial matters and focus on more important things. Perhaps.

Some things matter, matter very much. Faith, family, words, ideas, patience. 

Not in that order. Things that truly matter don't have an order any more than one part of a spiderweb matters more than another, or one leg of a milking stool, or one car tire, or one letter of the alphabet.

c0

The best Columbo, ever, IMHO: "Try And Catch Me" (October 1977), with Ruth Gordon.

This is the theme song that introduced the Columbo I grew up with:

c0

One among many of Pope's best-known works: An Essay on Man >.

Probably his most famous couplet, written as an epitaph for Sir Isaac Newton:

Nature and Nature's laws lay hid in night:

God said, "Let Newton be!" and all was light.

[2015-01-12]

c0

Pretty girls sell cigars, shower heads, and batteries.

(This post began with an observation that there should be a "make a wish foundation" for grownups. A little typing and backspacing turned into this.)

Top: George Burns in Oh, God! Bottom: George and Gracie.

My Grandma Grandy (Mom's mom, née Damon), grew up with George Burns and Gracie Allen on radio and TV, and I was in her living room in Fairview, PA when she tsk'd and pshaw'd at George escorting feathered showgirls who hung off each arm and towered over him. I'm sure it was more the double-entendres that she disliked (and I was too young to understand) than disrespect for Gracie's memory, for Gracie had died some years before and George was becoming a geriatric romeo.

I think the suggestive and Oh, God! George Burns was probably closer to the real George that we didn't get to know in vaudeville, radio, or early TV, but that George had also been devastated by Gracie's death. I recall seeing silent black-and-white footage of Jack Benny assisting George Burns after Gracie's graveside service. Burns appeared nearly unable to hold himself up. Gracie died in 1964. Benny in 1974. Burns in 1996.

George, cigars, and pretty girls.

George, shower heads, and pretty girls.

George, batteries, and pretty girls.

Say goodnight, Gracie

[2015-10-12]

c0

Oh, yes… there ought to be a "make a wish foundation for grownups," only it might better be called "The Erase a Regret Foundation," or "Die Happy Foundation," or "I Wish I Were 18 Again Foundation."

And there you have your George Burns connection.

[2014-11-15]

c0

I've grown accustomed to the taste...

Top row: Clarence's favorite coffees that he can't find locally. Bottom: Favorites Clarence buys regularly.

Do we grow to prefer something because we really like it, or because we're just exposed to it so much we become accustomed to it?

My morning coffee brought this to mind.

If I had a choice (and could find it), I'd drink Douwe Egbert every day all day, the same brand that Burger King used to serve before they switched to Seattle's Best (and if that's the best Seattle has to offer, I'm not missing much by having never been there).

I'd also buy MJB or Citavo. MJB used to be carried locally but no more. I think Citavo is limited to food service. I had it at a very nice restaurant in the St Augustine and Ormond-by-the-Sea area of Florida and it was outstanding.

But instead I brew Maxwell House, Folgers, or grocery store brand coffee in my Mr Coffee coffee maker, and I actually prefer them over Starbucks, Biggby, Tim Horton's, and other coffee shop brews.

I'd like to think I can tell the difference, but so long as I brew it strong and take it off the warmer just as it stops gurgling, it's hard to go wrong.

Same of course goes for wine, food, art, music, etc. I'd take a dry burger at McDonalds over to filet mignon any day, and not just because I like the taste better, but because I don't like the haute couture pretense that accompanies expensive fare.

c0

Dean Martin & Chris Botti I've grown accustomed to her face

c0

[2015-01-09]

Welcome to Me Too, DC, 3015

Yesterday I wrote about how the ease with which we take offense sometimes leads to juvenile debates over public expressions of personal beliefs.

You may have seen diagrams that show the various temples in classical Rome. Here's what DC might look like someday:

One possible view of Washington, DC a thousand years from now. Original cartoon map from acartoonist.com >

And not because there'll be passionate masses celebrating their ideologies there, but because Me Too is a world all its own with a population of one and infinite liberty.

c0

If we remain truly pluralistic and celebrate our diversity rather than reveling in civil rights battles, we might see what sincere adherents really look like. I'll bet they aren't the ones we think they are.

[2015-01-09]

c0

Debates over religious liberty are often juvenile, and this is one example.

Top: Satanic Temple's "snaketivity" in Lansing, MI, Christmas 2014. Bottom: A traditional nativity scene also at the state capitol. Both photos from ColoradoNewsday.com >

If we agree to live together and respect each others' rights to worship (or not), then we also grant some measure of public expression and tolerance.

A few examples: No one, not even the most rabid libertarian, is suggesting that a church can't put a cross on its steeple, or a nativity scene in its front yard. That is some measure of public expression, and the same logic extends to the airwaves (radio and TV) and highways (bumper stickers) and public places (I can bow my head before eating lunch, if I choose).

We like to practice routines and fabricate physical things that remind us of what's meaningful. With few exceptions, we're not evangelizing, just preserving.

Removing a fixed religious statement that's been in place for a couple generations or more is no different from removing a native American totem pole, or the Ancient Pueblo peoples' road system.[1]

What's that? Those have historical value?

I see. So because the people and their superstitions are long gone, they no longer offend?

I see. That means, should enough time pass, and all Christians and their beliefs are likewise stone or dust, it would be okay to allow public display?

Then it's not the ideas at issue, or a principle, or a law, but the offense.

Some minds are so fixated on what's right for everyone (especially the extreme right and left), they will insist on equal treatment for no other reason than a brief bit if infamy and the pleasure of watching others squirm.

We all like to be the center of attention sometimes, don't we? And we like taking something from someone else just because if we take it, they won't have it.

Like a child taking a toy from another child. A moment ago, it meant nothing, suddenly it's causing tears and tantrums.

Like the Detroit chapter of the Satanic Temple erecting a "snaketivity" scene in Lansing, the capital of my state of Michigan.

"Be not quick to take offense" is only the edge of an enormous store of peaceful coexistence, if everyone observed it.

c0

[1]

Group protesting cross scores removal of scripture sign at county park >

Dewey Hill cross will be turned into anchor >

[2015-01-07]

c0