What Might Have Been Lives in Dark and Earthy Places

When I was old enough to enjoy movies on TV but too young to go to the theater on my own, a movie came out called The Black Bird.» The star of the film, George Segal, showed up on talk shows of the time (Merv Griffin, Mike Douglas, etc), and everyone made a big fuss.

I felt like I was missing out on something wonderful. I was so young, I was not yet aware what a classic was, or a homage, or a parody, or the personalities associated with them. TV was my only window into the movies, and in those days it was a quite a narrow window.

 

Around that time, a local Erie, PA TV station decided to play The Maltese Falcon on the late late late show, and my little brain thought ah ha! I can watch this wonderful new movie that's in the theater. I stayed up late, turned off the lights, turned on a little portable TV in my bedroom, and kept the volume so low I could hardly hear it myself, for fear my parents would tell me to to turn it off.[1]

To my surprise, this movie wasn’t funny. And worse, I didn’t recognize any of the actors in it. None of those people had been on Merv Griffin. Something was wrong.[2] I turned it off and went to sleep.

Of course, sometime after that, having discovered a love for movies, I’ve watched and enjoyed The Maltese Falcon. In fact, in honor of the upcoming Oscars and TCM's tributes, I'm introducing it to my son this weekend.

Now, how this all got started: I had the chance to watch The Black Bird recently. I  recorded a late night showing over digital antenna TV. Wouldn't you know, it was nearly unwatchable. In fact, I gave it about a half hour and deleted it. After all these years, I hadn’t missed a thing.

But I did learn something: I learned that memories of what might have been are often more satisfying than memories of what would have been. Not that you have the chance to do an A/B test, mind you, but the idea is poetically balanced and fulfilling.

Still, what might have been sustains us, in a dark and earthy place that remains rich and fecund as the day the dreams took root.

[1]
We had the four major networks in town - WSEE Channel 3 (CBS), WICU Channel 12 (NBC), WJET Channel 24 (ABC), and WQLN Channel 54 (PBS). My guess is that it would have been on WJET, which had more late night programming.

A TV in a kid's bedroom was unheard of for middle-class Americans in those days, and this was a special treat for me and my brother Tom; we were storing some things for a relative, including a sofa and TV, which transformed our attic bedroom into a den, the coolest thing ever for a couple tweens.

[2]
I also once tried to call James Arness on the basement extension in my boyhood home by looking him up in the Erie, PA telephone book. Best friend Rich Nickel had to tell me they have different phone books for different cities, and Mr Arness wasn’t in ours. I had a lot of courage for a little kid, though, I was gonna do it, I was gonna call Matt Dillon right then and there.

Started: 2012-02-03